Photo credit:Matt Brown

I am already grouchy today, have not been my happy self for several days, and so I bring you the following blog post. I tried to write about what was bothering me, and I realized I have no idea what is bothering me. So instead I thought about the things that get under my skin in general, and came up with this list.

Here is a list of things that irritate me, in no particular order.

It irritates me when there is someone in the express checkout lane with more than 10 items. This is the EXPRESS lane, people. We get in it because we are in a hurry and just need to pick a few things up at the grocery store, and you are ruining the system for everybody when you slow down the system with your 17 (yes, I count your stuff) items. And don’t even get me started on the lady who ‘just forgot one little thing that she has to run back and get’. Arg.

Speaking of checkout lanes, why does Walmart think that 20 items or less is an express lane? 20 items? Really? But then again, everything at Walmart happens at the speed of dark anyway, so why should it be a surprise that they believe that 20 items will go fast?

It irritates me when in traffic people don’t give the wave. You know the one. You are driving along, traffic is dragging, and someone wants over into your lane so you slow down and let them in and then they don’t give you the wave. People! Is it so much to ask? Wave at me! Acknowledge my tiny kindness in your life!

I predict that this is the one that will get me in the most trouble: It irritates me when people say that having their dog/cat is just like having a kid. I don’t mean when people use that as a euphemism for ‘I love my pet a whole lot’, or even when someone means that ‘Wow, this pet really takes a lot of care and attention.’ Those things I can understand. It’s when people really mean that having a pet is equivalent to having a child. ‘My pet is like my child.’ No, it isn’t. I know this because ‘my child is like my pet’ is really a messed up statement.

Also irritating me: when someone talks on their cell phone when they are in a checkout line. (Hm. I have a lot of issues with checkout lines.) No one wants to eavesdrop on your conversation, but we are trapped there with you. Also, the person who is about to ring up your purchase is… a person! They may be an employee and there to wait on you, but they are a person who deserves the basic respect of you interacting with them politely and not with your phone to your ear. What is so important anyway that it cannot wait? And if it is that important, make your call, THEN get in line.

This one doesn’t irritate me, but more weirds me out: Women with really long hair. Like past their bum long. Can’t really say why, but I have a general suspicion of them. I know, weird.

Last one: When I go into a store, and a clerk asks if I need any help and I say no, and they keep wanting to help me. Ack! Too much pressure! I just want to look at all the stuff I am not going to buy anyway! Go away! Stop suggesting things! Ack!

Woo! I am glad I got that off my chest!  Now I am dying to know: what bugs YOU?



Filed under Funny stuff

12 responses to “Grouchy

  1. There isn’t enough space in this comment box! LOL You make me laugh, even when you’re grumpy. Of course, we are separated by computer screens and miles of electrons and all that other stuff.

  2. Christy "Pie" Oates

    Well, Well, Well, ms nicolewhitespeaks! You might as well have named this blog – the things “Pie” does that bug me! 🙂 That’s me in the checkout line that forgot just one thing (usually the one I came in for and if not that it will always be the one and only thing Stevie asked me to pick up) and it is also me that talks on the cell phone while in line and while checking out. Does it help that I sometimes say to my caller that I have to put the phone down because I can’t pay and talk to them at the same time – I am not putting it down to interact with the checker – I just need two hands and one whole brain. I usually then pick up the phone and say, OK now I can talk again. If there is any saving our relationship right now it may be this…..I NEVER enter the express lane with more than the alotted amount of items. I am completely paranoid. I will unload, realize I do have too much, reload and go to a different lane….all while talking to my mom on the phone. Talent.

    The wave is reserved for people I think may shoot me in the back of the head if I don’t wave….I feel like they can’t see me anyway and I always have to wait till I am in the lane far enough that they can see me then I hope they did since I am still trying to thank them. Could it be that they waved and you missed it? I make sure the scary people see my wave, I will go to extremes to let them know how nice I think they are, by my wave.

    WalMart at the speed of dark….so true. That must make HEB at the speed of light!

    One last thing….guess what I told Stevie tonight….I stood in the kitchen and said – I’m grumpy! Why am I grumpy? I don’t even know why I am grumpy! I am completely irritated about something – but I don’t know what that something is. Then I read him the first paragraph of your blog. I knew I liked you NicoleWhiteSpeaks!

    btw:lunch was great 🙂

    • Shelly Branham

      You crack me up Pie! You are SOOOOO that person in the checkout on the phone. I’ve witnessed it. 😉 And I can totally see you in the express lane putting everything back into your basket (while talking on the phone). You are so crazy! I’m also tremendously happy to know that some people may have given me the wave and I just missed it. Sometimes I think they may have forgotten to use their whole hand… maybe that’s why I missed it. LOL.

    • Oh, Pie! You are right! Now that made me laugh so hard to think that one of my favorite people is one that matches the list! At least your hair isn’t that long! Love you back, and lunch WAS great!

  3. Shelly Branham

    What bugs me are “oochers” in traffic. You know who I’m talking about… the people who know their lane is ending (the 6 warning signs should have been a slight clue, but apparently a flashing neon sign doesn’t make an impact on them either) but keep driving until they are on the shoulder or force their way into traffic. This is so extremely rude and I find it to also be one of THE most selfish driving habits on the road. Also “ooching” can include exiting and getting right back on the freeway just to cut ahead in the line of traffic. Selfish!!! There are other people on the road having to yield to your self -absorbed, “I am the king of the road” driving lunacy. Get over yourself and look around, you are one of thousands of cars headed the same direction….not one of one!!!

    • Oochers! Now I have a name for it! Yes, I agree. Get in line with the rest of us; quit trying to cut! I am the one who keeps like 2 inches between me and the car in front of me so I don’t let the oocher in.

  4. melissa

    * people that stand so close to you in line that they keep bumping you and somehow being that close is going to make the line faster.
    * people who post on FB that their life is perfect and amazing everyday, its not and everybody knows it! nothing is perfect everyday.
    * definitely super long hair and over processed dead hair, the kind where you fear for their life if someone lights a match!

    there is to many to list but this was fun hearing everybody annoyances and reading yours!!

  5. Waiter/Waitress pet peeve: making you wait an unreasonable amount of time for the check after you have finished your meal. My entire reason for coming to the restaurant is now done, and I’m suddenly held hostage. I’d rather you not assume that I want to sit there and take my time chatting with my dinner guests. My bill should arrive when you clear my plates and obligaorily ask if I want dessert, knowing I’ll say no. It’s also a win-win to get me out of there as soon as possible because you’re going to increase your amount of tips. My tip isn’t an hourly rate, so clear the table and get a fresh group for a new tip. And yes, I know that waitressing is a very difficult job, blah, blah, blah. So is being a surgeon, and we expect efficiency and proficiency there. And yes, I also know the difference between a waitress and a surgeon.

  6. Carolyn

    For mutiple years the ‘thing’ that really annoys me, makes me see red, etc. is ….people who look down on people. I believe we are truly created equal by God, maybe some just have lost belief in themselves. Am reminded of the old saying(paraphrased of course):
    If everyone in the world were just like me…..what kind of world would this world be?

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